I wrote these for the Omnificent English Dictionary in English Form, a magnificent, ambitious, and slightly insane attempt to write a limerick for every word in the English language, one letter group at a time. You can see my additions and revisions there, but I like to keep them here as well; the menu below leads to permanent pages for each letter group. You can also see some co-written pieces, an area especially aimed at OEDILFers, and a page of limerick biographies of famous artists.
When a takeaway offers you flake,
It’s no choccie deep-fried by mistake.
If yer still in the dark,
It’s the Aussie for shark,
Served with chips and a Coke or a shake.
If wrapping your jaws around Jaws
Is a prospect that gives you some pause:
What you’ll put in your tummy
Is probably Gummy.
Great Whites you can’t bite, say state laws.
The Falklands’ domain, .fk,
Could provoke (as in “no f-king way”),
Those who call them Malvinas,
Who are not quite as keen as
The locals on what ICANN say.
Argentina maintains a claim to the islands it calls Islas Malvinas, and has complained to the Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers about the continued existence of the Falkland Islands’ domain, dot F K.
You could buy an FJ once to suit
Any Aussie: sedan, van or ute.
Of the cars made by Holden,
This model’s an old ’un;
Them bodgie blokes thought it was beaut.
The Holden FJ was manufactured from 1953 to 1957, during the height of Australia’s “Bodgie and Widgie” era.